We've all heard it at one time or another in our lives; you may even have been one of the brave ones to actually sing the words out loud. But to live them is another thing entirely.
"Amazing grace how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me. I once was lost, but now I'm found. Was blind, but now I see."
Sight can be a tricky thing. Sure, we all want 20/20 vision, but clarity comes with a price. And often the cost is our comfortability and giving up our personal agenda for a corporate one.
Recently, I felt God calling me to simplify my life and my obligations. This sounds good in theory and when I first felt this nudging I embraced it wholeheartedly and enthusiastically because I was, well...tired. Not just tired but bone-achingly exhausted. Weary of the daily grind, endless to-do lists, and constant electronic correspondence. The process of simplifying seemed like answered prayer. However, once I realized that God was calling me to lay down a personal dream and aspiration, I'm ashamed to admit, I hesitated. I truly felt called to pursue the dream and had worked so hard to make it a reality. Shouldn't those efforts be rewarded? I mean I was positively impacting the lives of families around me and providing opportunities for the personal growth of others. For goodness sake, it's not like it was a purely selfish ambition! Or was it?
I asked for clarity and that is what was given. I saw the situation for what it was...a way to feed my personal ego, my personal ambition, my pride. Something that had once been fueled by a desire to serve had turned into a way to make me feel important. I once was blind but now I see...
The problem with sight is that once you have it you can't go back. You can't un-see things that have been seen. You can't claim to be blind anymore without it being a lie. You can either pretend you didn't see the truth, say you saw it and it wasn't real, or own the sight and use it to grow. I'm choosing the latter and here is what I know now that I can't deny: I am chosen by God to show His love to broken people just like me in authentic ways by serving others however He sees fit. I have been so caught up in being successful in my own eyes and putting pretty checkmarks next to all the items on my "Life Goals" list that I didn't even bother to consult my Maker in regards to His plans for my creation. I assumed I already knew and then I ran with it. It's incredibly obvious now that I was so busy making my mark that I didn't let Him make His mark through me.
Psalm 32:8 states, " I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you." I truly believe that one of the ways He instructs and teaches us is by opening our spiritual eyes to areas where we have been blind. What is God trying to reveal to you? If you're not sure then ask Him, He desires to continually grow in relationship with each one of us as His children which means He wants to guide and direct us. Jeremiah 29:13 encourages us saying "you will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart." But be prepared for some stunning revelations better than any pair of cute Cartier frames can provide.